小朋友讀了小學後才做全職媽媽的，請指教ｏ

vlbcjl

mama2000,

You're welcome.  Hope you'd enjoy being a full-time mother as I do.

ms,

Depends on whether your job allows you to have time and energy reserve for your kids after your work.  For me, my work was too demanding.  It required my complete devotion of time and energy on one hand and face unreasonable criticism and office politics every day.  Although my salary was higher - 30K+ incl. fringe benefit, I still made up my mind to quit.  I just felt that it didn't worth struggling every day for the mere sake of money and gave up health and the precious time with my daughter in her critical growing years.  

It was a hard decision really.  Once I quit, I know I couldn't find another well-paid job like this and I couldn't spend as much as I want.  Until now, I didn't regret and I wouldn't look back.  I will just forget what I could earn in the past but enjoy and treasure everything I have with my daughter and my hubby.

sumheima

ms,
I have given up a almost monthly 40k job in several years ago, but I didn't regret for this.  Todays, I still enjoy to spend my time to my kids everyday because I think it is precious to share and grow up with them during their childhood.

ms 寫道:
Giving up almost 40k per month will be too hard?  What do you think?

Eva

非常同意!

我讚成在有經濟能力之下,或是工作太忙,經常要朝9晚9怎至沒有定時工作的媽咪,或是小朋友有情緒問題,需要家長特別照顧才特別需要全職媽咪. 因為現在的社會跟我們小時已經是兩碼子的事,經濟能力會直接影響家庭和諧和兒女的學習需要等.

我認識的媽咪中,有些有經濟能力的,還有能力雇用工人的全職媽咪多很熱心當學校的義工,又經常跟女兒參加各式各樣的課外活動,增廣見聞,不用為趕回家做這做那(洗衫煮飯和清潔等).

有些本來是中產階層,一心想當個全職好媽媽來支援兒女,結果是;因為收入大減,不能跟以前一樣給兒女參加所有喜愛的課外活動和興趣班等.又因為自己其望過高,為孩子帶來不小壓力,結果吃力不討好,反令自己和兒女不開心.

有些是因為失業又或者是低收入人仕,眼見自己的入息7除8扣之後,跟請工人差不多,才想做全職媽咪.她們未必真心喜歡照顧孩子. 可能沒有工作之後,情緒更不穩定,未必適合照顧孩子.

我想,如果當個全職媽咪只是為了想照顧兒女的功課的話,真的要詳細考慮一下自己的性格是否適合;家人(不是自己ONLY)對生活質素的要求和另一半的心理壓力情況等. 這些都是日後要面對的.

我試過問兩個孩子(一個8歲,一個剛5歲),如果媽咪不上班,每天來照顧你們好嗎? 他們一起大叫"好野". 之後我再說:那麼以後要節省一點,可能要買小一點玩具和去小些旅行了. 他們想了一下說: 媽咪,你還是繼續工作吧!  有夠現實的孩子!!可能我們想付出,應為對他們好的事,只是自己一廂情願!

其實現實就是那麼現實. 可能我在加國二十多年,有點鬼婆性格的妹妹講的岩:要為自己著想一下,不要把全部精力投放到孩子身上,這個世界沒有誰會因為沒有誰而不能活,太緊張只會增加孩子和自己的壓力,又做成孩子太依賴和不能接受突然沒有了我們照顧,便不會生活的樣子. 她叫我和大家姐不要太緊張,要放開一些. 但是緊張就是緊張,不是要放便放得開; 可能這個育兒態度已經成為香港的文化了?!

Anita_Lee 寫道:
呢個問題我都諗左好耐, 不過最後我都係決定佢升三年級先, 其實我覺得我唔做野番去揍小朋友真係會有好有唔好, 我都驚自己太過著緊佢功課, 反而會產生磨擦, 需然e+小時間對住佢, 但我會好重視同佢相處o既時間,  相反如果我唔做野, 又無左個工人, 我要用好多時間係打理屋企各樣各樣, 雖然我係屋企同佢一齊, 但我係做緊另外o既家務, 而唔係同佢一齊玩或都溫習

Kristy555

自我仔仔升k3開始已有這個想法, 怕仔仔過了這個學習期會教都無得教, 老公都好支持我唔做, 但我又唔想無啦啦唔做, 好似好可惜o甘, 之前成日為了這個問題, 攪到自己好似雙面人o甘. 成日o念過埋年至決定.....但原來主真的為我們安排了一d事, 12月初, 公司突然lay-off幾位同事, 其中一個有我份, 我做了8,9年, 賠足     不知開心左幾耐, 又o岩o岩o甘多假期, 老公陪足我成10日. 1月3日開始同仔仔過番學既日子, 希望佢有進步啦!


***************************************
由 chitchatmommy 寫道:
其實，我都有曾經想過，不如等仔仔升左小二，小三後，等功課再深D，才辭工在家教仔，但又怕好似EmilyDavey話，到時想教他都唔比你教了，而且學習基礎打唔好，好難進步，加上有D壞習慣是越細個改左越好，大左就好難改變．

chitchatmommy

Kristy555,

真係好戥你高興，有錢賠之餘又有人幫你做埋決定，我相信你做左全職媽媽後，仔仔各方面都會有進步．

唉，我現在的想法，就正正是你從前所煩惱的：”唔想無啦啦唔做, 好似好可惜o甘”, 但又”怕仔仔過了這個學習期會教都無得教”:cry:

ms

Kristy555,
I envy you very much.

HKQQbaby

如果需照顧兩位小朋友,自己的月薪低於兩萬, 老公的收入穩定, 最重要的是:自己做慣家務(如打掃 做飯) 又樂意照顧bb
我覺得bb讀K1 時 做全職媽媽較合適

因 bb"3歲定80"
如你從小就讓bb有早睡早起 喜歡閱讀 勇於發問...
的好習慣 對於將來她們升學及做人 都很有用

當然 因為收入少了 出外消費 少了
但生活條件一定比自己小時候好

bb的要求其實很簡單 有媽咪天天照顧
總比 只有個 總不出聲的印傭好

mamailoveu

I agree with HKQQBaby's comment.

If I can do it, I don't mind to give up my job and devoted my time to my son.  Child is equal to time, time fly and it won't come back.  I believe no moms want to miss any part when your child grow up.  Mtime, the relationship between you two is extremely close.

Chole

I gave up a very high pay job when my daughter started K1.  She was very attached to my helper at that time as I had no energy to play with her after work.

At first I always queried whether my decision was right or not.   I did not have sense of security (in terms of money) and it seemed boring at home.  And I seriously considered going back to work.   

As time goes by, I realise that it is quite impossible for demanding the helper to teach her the kind of values that I want her to possess.  This is definitely the responsibility of the parents.   In addition, my girl is extremely talkative and asks many many questions and I am sure that without my presence she would have been discouraged by the helper already.   

Now I enjoy the time we spend together, be it going to activities, chatting, shopping (of course, I cannot shop as much as before).  I am glad that I have the luxury to accompany her in childhood.

The "fringe" benefit of quiting the job is I have better relationship with my hubby as I very much appreciate his willingness to shoulder all of the financial burden.  

Chole

   

54830891

我記起在多月前在頭條日報看到方敏生所寫的一篇文章，大既是在美國有記者做了一次調查，訪問了多位有金錢和有地位的CEO，問問他們若時光可以倒流，他們最想做的是甚麼事情？結果是他們不約而同地說他們寧可放棄今天的一切，而可以倍伴家人和子女一起成長、渡過開心的歲月。我常常把這文章自勉。

pingukiwi

我係仔仔升k3時辭職做全職媽咪, 除了少咗$shopping外,其他野都好咗,     仲多咗個新成員tim ......

CHUCHU

chitchatmommy,

我都好戥Kristy555高興.

記得幾年前我都一路plan 想做全職媽咪,我都希望公司cut 人時cut 咗我,等我拿返筆,又或者經濟好d先.但係等呀等呀,似乎尼日都冇到,心想再過多一段日子,我小孩最需要我的時間就係咁流走.有時真係冇咁完美,我又冇宗教信仰為我安排,個一刻我決定3個月後走,我為我自己安辦/計劃.我要找緊時間,時間唔會等我.

現在已冇做全職一年八個月,係六個月前我找到半職工,返上午,不過就比較忙,要顧兩番,但佢地放學前我已在家,只係holiday時比較煩,其它一切順利.:wink:

chitchatmommy 寫道:
Kristy555,

真係好戥你高興，有錢賠之餘又有人幫你做埋決定，我相信你做左全職媽媽後，仔仔各方面都會有進步．

唉，我現在的想法，就正正是你從前所煩惱的：”唔想無啦啦唔做, 好似好可惜o甘”, 但又”怕仔仔過了這個學習期會教都無得教”:cry:

chitchatmommy

Hi CHUCHU,

絕對明白你當年的感受及所作的掙扎。亦很認同你所說的，不希望小孩最需要我們的時間白白流走。當年你怎樣說服老公支持你的決定?

當了全職媽媽後，起碼有更多時間陪仔仔。我打算三個月後辭職（唔知到時又會唔會變卦 ），希望可學你一樣安排好自己的生活及時間。

Cheers  

家庭主婦

我都係由亞囝Ｋ２開始轉做全職媽咪，好處多過壞處！我都冇後悔做左哩個決定。

SUSANNA

我個女依家讀緊 k2, 我都在想這問題, 但自問我學歷不高, 又沒有耐性, 如不做野是否可以幫到囡囡.

另我在住地區返工, 時間固定, 收入好, 工作不辛若, 真係吾知點簡.

DGmum

Dear CHUCHU,

我好羡慕你可以找到 half  day job.因我有 2 個小朋友, (5.5 yr and 15 mths), 現在常常覺得下班後回家時間不夠用, 大仔今年9月上小一, 細女下年又要入 kinder.  所以真係好想有多喲時間陪佢地.  請問你介唔介意PM 我講你的half day job's nature? working hour? 人工 etc?

Many Thanks.

DGmum   

TINGMUM

chu chu,

I want to know it too. Please also pm me!

Mrssslui

我又係番工時間隱定,不用加班,又冇咩工作壓力,而且福利好.
子女都番緊全日,基本上佢地放學後,一小時內都見到我了.而且我放工後仍精神活力充沛,可以教佢地,同佢地玩,放假時全程陪足(因為佢地學校假期,我同老公都一定會攞假陪).
你地認為咁既情況下,做全職媽媽用處大嗎?
不過,大女9月升小一,約3時多便放學,4時回家,佢就要有1個多小時自己做功課,你地點睇?

CHUCHU

TINGMUM, DGmum,  

我唔逐一pm啦,大家一齊分享呀.

我返九點到一點,包飯(有嬸嬸煮),係trading小公司, 幫個會計做下數,send下fax,入下資料咁囉,人工就唔高,係月薪計,未到要報強積金人工(咁你地明啦),不過就易請假,遲返就遲走,都好彈性,係觀塘區,幾近地鐵,4個站就到,所以車錢都平.份工冇咩壓力,而且我唔想用腦,想留返屋企比兩個女用呀麻!   

不過做PART TIME就得要放下自尊 :cry: ,要嘗比人老點,因為之前我係做Secretary,仲係大公司,從來未做過工廠區,我都用咗成三個月多時間應付心理關口,而家ok曬.開心返啦.  

chitchatmommy,

你問得好,我老公係唔多贊成我唔做,因為佢覺得我份工好好,褔利又好(我覺得佢唔想有壓力就真,一個顧曬一頭家),連朋友同事都唔贊成我返屋企揍仔,浪費喎,就連有d朋友揍更仔冇返工都咁話.
但我問過好多女人,發覺逢親太太份工好隱定,老公就會做d自由工,唔隱定,而且唔係太過上進(當然唔係個個啦),咁我就比咗好多借口比自己,一意孤行:tongue: 初初佢都半推半就架 , 而家慣咗,佢仲勤力咗,適應埋一家之主d壓力添. 嘻嘻

chitchatmommy 寫道:
Hi CHUCHU,

絕對明白你當年的感受及所作的掙扎。亦很認同你所說的，不希望小孩最需要我們的時間白白流走。當年你怎樣說服老公支持你的決定?

當了全職媽媽後，起碼有更多時間陪仔仔。我打算三個月後辭職（唔知到時又會唔會變卦 ），希望可學你一樣安排好自己的生活及時間。

Cheers  

mom5354

sumheima

Would you mind to tell us your former occupation?
The job duty is very busy/not?

Thank you.