pls help. about my 1.5 yrs old boy, thks

BBIX

my little boy always bites us, even my other family, sometimes he also slaps us, what I can do and it's normal behaviour for the toddles do that?? even we said "no" to him, and slaps him, and explaint him he is hurting us, but sounds doesn't work. I feel very depressed that I can't do anything, and everytime when I slap him, I feel also upset and fail to be a mom. pls help!!!  

lucida

Hi BBIX,

You may try the following.

You can set a "NAUGHTY" cirle / corner / seat to him.
Tell him : whenever he has such bad behaviour (biting others), he needs to sit on the Naughty Corner. Give him warning for the first bite (with explanation). Send him to the corner if he does the 2nd time. As your son is only 1.5-year-old, let him sit there for 1.5 minutes. Ignore him during this 1.5 minutes. Then, you come back to him, kiss him with saying "I Love You! To be a good boy.", & set him free.

Most of the unfavorable behaviours can be got rid of after some time. The time depends on the children. Some may take 1 month, some may take less than that. You have to be patient when the "Naughty" corner is adopted. This method is very effective. Most of the Nurserys also use this method for the naughty children at school.

carollpc

BBIX,

I also use this method if my daughter has bad behaviour and it works.  This method is very effective for my daughter.  However, as different child has different character, don't give up if your son does not show any improvement in the first few times.

wongamy1978

carollpc,
According to the child development, 1.5 years old boy likes to copy the adult's behaviour. First, may be you check who take care of him. Second, you observe what TV programme he likes to watch, e.g kung fu programme.    

BBIX

oh.. so nice all of u, well.. for the "naughty"  corner, I will try fm tomorrow, I hope it will be work for him, and I hope he understand what he does that is very bad and hurt. and actually, he is taken care by us, we don't hv helper, but we don't bite ppl, so I don't know how come he did that to us... so painful...I hope he will hv improvement or stop his bad behaviour b4 nursery next yr la....
Thks again to all of u!

lucida

HI BBIX,

Just want to remind you one thing. When you talk to your son about his mis-behaviour, please make sure your eyes are at his eye level.

Hope he will change from a naughty boy to a good boy SOON!

羊羊

小朋友o係呢個年紀，會模仿大人的一舉一動！我諗要教佢唔好隨便slap人，你都唔好slap佢！

如果唔係，佢就會覺得slap人係解決問題既辦法！(就好似你slap佢想佢乖一樣)

elainec

hi bbix,

i also use this method too, i just want to add a couple of points.

i must remind u when u talk to your son, make sure u communicate that the behavior is bad, not him, say "no hitting/biting, hitting/biting is not nice".  don't say "bad boy", then he might think he is a bad person which will affect his self esteem.  actually hitting and even biting is a very normal reaction to frustration when he can't tell u how he feels, it is a normal reaction.... however i would refrain on hitting him to punish him, for if u hit him but u tell him he can't hit then there's a contradiction.  if u hit him when he is naughty, it only teaches him that hitting is the solution and he will in turn learn exactly what u want to stop.

after he sits in the naughty area for the right amount of time (1 minute for 1 yr of age), then u go ask him to say sorry, if he says sorry then hug him and kiss him and make up. if he doesn't, start the time again till he says sorry.  try to stay insight, don't leave him alone for he's too young (eg. don't lock him in a dark room).  once he says sorry, explain your view point one more time then act as everything is 100% ok, don't hold grudges.

when he can speak, also encourage him to tell u how he feels before he acts out his frustration, tell him "tell me what u want, how u feel, don't cry/hit, speak".  in time, he will learn to tell u.

and most important, try to stay calm thru out the whole ordeal, it is hard to do and we r learning ourselves how to control our own emotions so that our little ones can learn it too!!!

take it easy, remember this method is not a miracle that happens over night.  love and patience is the key!  good luck!!!

check out this site....
http://www.bbc.co.uk/parenting/your_kids/toddlers_discipline.shtml