好失落!有冇Ｄ積極方法去平衡失望之心情?

YoungKY

Very disappointed on the interview result!
Very down!! How can we cheer up?
Any suggestion?

nicolelouie

BBTWIN，我想同你講you are not alone
我都係一人作戰，男人諗野好唔同，讀書唔係一切，邊間都一樣.........今曰同佢講a學校點點點，明天已經忘得一乾二淨，連第一志願係邊間都唔記得，真係好激心！
唔緊要，我地儘力，做對得住自己的事。

原帖由 BBTWIN 於 10-10-29 10:47 發表


我係全職媽咪. 其實我都只係想老公支持下o者. 佢唔幫手搵資料我唔介意. 總之唔好再同我講:"我都叫你自行報我間母校架啦, 自己拿來煩 .". ...

thomasha

My primary goal is to raise him as a caring, self-motivating, disciplined and keen-on-learning child.  To me, academic performance is important but not as crucial as what I have just mentioned.

原帖由 PoorParent 於 10-10-30 18:00 發表
Yes, agree
Out of mind
Back to basic of education for kids:
Main course is academic for university entry and career
Sport medals or art prizes are only the second

thomasha

Well as parents we have to know how to cheer ourselves up and then cheer our child up.  It would be most unfortunate for the child to be dragged into the sphere of disappointment and sadness.  The "crisis" can be turned into a learning process.  

I think we might be referring to the same school for our disastrous interviews.  The way we handled it was:
(1) asked my son how he felt about the interview when we walked down the road;
(2) when he said "it was terrible", we tried to feel sympathetic to him and did not ask much about the content of the interview;
(3) after coming home, we played his favourite games with him and he was all happy again after 2 hours, when we were ready to go to another interview (SPCC).
(4) my wife and I already assumed he would be rejected outright, so we had zero expectation from the school and we took it as virtually rejected, i.e. "out of sight, out of mind".

Don't let any one incident prolong your sadness and disappointment.  There are many more important matters ahead and we should not spend too much time feeling sorry for ourselves or the child.

原帖由 PoorParent 於 10-10-30 16:24 發表
Many Thanks
the only disastrous one was DXX interview.
No language testing/calculation/ games/ IQ test/ memory test/ story telling as the other kids had.
Only sit for so many difficult questions that  ...

thomasha

You're most welcome.

There are countless methods of relaxation, but the most important thing is to "let go" of the interviews because they are already past events and nothing can be done about them.  If you need to remember anything about the interviews, try to write them down and don't use your brain, which is already stressed out by this time.  

Although I am not a mother, I lost sleep one night because we had to wake up early the following morning for an interview - which ended up in disaster anyway.  I had my favorite activity before going to bed so I managed to sleep reasonably well until the following morning, though I could still feel the (subconscious) stress because I woke up early in the morning.

Worrying never helps anything, that's why I don't let it last long as far as possible.  Spending quality time with your child or devotion to work would be a good way to divert your attention on uncontrollable things.

原帖由 PoorParent 於 10-10-30 15:56 發表
Thanks Milkonline & Thomasha,

I dream about the Q & A of the P1 interveiw & make me wake up in the middle of the night (even after sleeping Pill). Poor sleep for 1-2 months.
I will try the methods m ...

thomasha

1. Body massage
2. Sports/gym
3. Shopping (but can be destructive when you check the credit card statement later)
4. Play games or do homework with the child - they need A LOT OF attention
5. Go to a theme park with the child
6. Stay away from the computer at least 1 hour before you go to bed.  Reading the computer screen needs a lot of concentration and makes your brain active.
7. Read newspapers (not the work-related pages or the education section) or a book before going to bed.  
8. Turn on the TV with a headphone while lying in bed - if it is equipped with a timer, use it.  You might fall asleep without knowing it and the timer will relieve you the need to turn it off later.

原帖由 milkonline2 於 10-10-30 00:06 發表
I went to massage plus do some shopping. For your insomnia problem, I think you better don't stick to computer before sleeping.  Also, try to take vitamin E 200 iu one hour before you sleep may help.  ...

milkonline2

I went to massage plus do some shopping. For your insomnia problem, I think you better don't stick to computer before sleeping.  Also, try to take vitamin E 200 iu one hour before you sleep may help.  This vitamin is also good for skin! Try to avoid sleeping pills! Cheer up!

原帖由 PoorParent 於 10-10-29 05:09 PM 發表
Same as us (me & spouse)
1. Insomnia need pills
2. Keep on buying: computer, audovisual stuffs, new car, property etc (really with real need) to distract ownself away from P1 application. Better than  ...

[ 本帖最後由 milkonline2 於 10-10-30 00:08 編輯 ]

milkonline2

Thanks! Just today a littlle bit worry so that's why I need to seek for distraction! Feeling good now!

原帖由 ANChan59 於 10-10-29 04:22 PM 發表


Take it easy, you will be fine. Look back after some years, no big deal.

BBTWIN

原帖由 thomasha 於 10-10-29 19:39 發表
或者你先生唔想你咁煩，所以先至叫你用d簡單有容易o既方法去搞小學o既事。我地男人就係唔想太座咁痛苦。

其實我都知佢用意,唔駛交學費又唔駛煩. 我都唔想煩架, 不過我真係唔能夠再揀一間過唔倒自己既學校. 呢幾年就係最好証明, 我投入唔倒對女既幼稚園生涯 .

thomasha

或者你先生唔想你咁煩，所以先至叫你用d簡單有容易o既方法去搞小學o既事。我地男人就係唔想太座咁痛苦。

原帖由 BBTWIN 於 10-10-29 10:47 發表


我係全職媽咪. 其實我都只係想老公支持下o者. 佢唔幫手搵資料我唔介意. 總之唔好再同我講:"我都叫你自行報我間母校架啦, 自己拿來煩 .". ...

ANChan59

原帖由 milkonline2 於 10-10-29 12:55 發表
昨天，我無不停咁refresh BK、不停睇住個電話； 但今天，我終於患上依個＂小一入學選校＂侯群症，我依家要去接受治療，出去行街shopping發洩一下，實在忍無可忍、等無可等了！各位病患者敬請保重？ ...

Take it easy, you will be fine. Look back after some years, no big deal.

milkonline2

昨天，我無不停咁refresh BK、不停睇住個電話； 但今天，我終於患上依個＂小一入學選校＂侯群症，我依家要去接受治療，出去行街shopping發洩一下，實在忍無可忍、等無可等了！各位病患者敬請保重？

[ 本帖最後由 milkonline2 於 10-10-29 12:56 編輯 ]

BBTWIN

原帖由 thomasha 於 10-10-29 00:24 發表
可否透露一下，你係全職媽咪定係有全職工作的？

我諗如果家境許可，媽咪全職照顧小朋友，爸爸就多數會將小一入學o既重任交托俾媽咪，如果兩個都要做野，就應該每人做d先至公平。 ...

我係全職媽咪. 其實我都只係想老公支持下o者. 佢唔幫手搵資料我唔介意. 總之唔好再同我講:"我都叫你自行報我間母校架啦, 自己拿來煩 .".

thomasha

可否透露一下，你係全職媽咪定係有全職工作的？

我諗如果家境許可，媽咪全職照顧小朋友，爸爸就多數會將小一入學o既重任交托俾媽咪，如果兩個都要做野，就應該每人做d先至公平。

原帖由 BBTWIN 於 10-10-28 21:55 發表


我老公咪唔一樣羅, 由頭到尾都只係我搵資料. 對女讀咩學校佢都冇所謂. 佢認為真係讀得書既小朋友去到邊都冇問題. 讀唔到入到名校就仲幣. 佢又成日話我自行唔報佢間母校, 係我自己拿來煩. 我自己就想搵間學術水平ok ...

ANChan59

Yes, I am dad as well.

BBTWIN

原帖由 thomasha 於 10-10-28 20:37 發表
其實上黎BK o既爸爸唔少架，只係我地有時由留言睇唔出係男定女，就假設係媽咪姐。

關心小朋友o既將來，爸媽都要o既，不過兩者用o既方法可能唔一樣。 ...

我老公咪唔一樣羅, 由頭到尾都只係我搵資料. 對女讀咩學校佢都冇所謂. 佢認為真係讀得書既小朋友去到邊都冇問題. 讀唔到入到名校就仲幣. 佢又成日話我自行唔報佢間母校, 係我自己拿來煩. 我自己就想搵間學術水平okay, 校風又一定好的學校(我覺得校風重要過學術水平). 所以一直以黎都只得我一人作戰 ! 我而家都係用平常心待之, 只希望盡快有個了結. 大家要加油呀!!!!!