怎樣可以培養小朋友既自發性?

marcuscyrus

samuel89 發表於 12-4-3 15:34
呵呵....我兩個兒子完全符合晒你既例........我估呢d可能系兩個兒子既通例.....

...

根據我所觀察，幾乎所有siblings都有相似的pattern，尤其同性別的，所以我都感恩，大兒是比較有規矩的一個，細佬跟著走也錯不了那裡

samuel89

marcuscyrus 發表於 12-4-3 15:37
根據我所觀察，幾乎所有siblings都有相似的pattern，尤其同性別的，所以我都感恩，大兒是比較有規矩的一個 ...

我覺得細佬跟著走走下,會發覺很辛苦, 所以慢慢"練精學懶"既性格會愈來愈突出, 我兩個兒子既性格就系甘愈來愈兩極化.....

marcuscyrus

samuel89 發表於 12-4-3 15:51
我覺得細佬跟著走走下,會發覺很辛苦, 所以慢慢"練精學懶"既性格會愈來愈突出, 我兩個兒子既性格就系甘愈來 ...

這也是我擔心的
哥哥因為責任心重，常常替細佬打點
細佬一有哥哥在，就變成依賴

huba

esther_lam_ny 發表於 12-3-30 13:52
如題, 請大家比d意見.
囝囝4.5歲, 次次食飯要不斷提, 但都要食成個鐘.
做功課其實如果專心5分鐘可以做完,  ...

Hope my sharing is not off topic.
My son is 6 years old and attending P1. This morning, my son woke up before me. When I woke up, I found him doing homework by himself. (Note that this is not an individual incident.) Why did he take initiative for doing it? I think it relates to the incentives - freetime. My son treasures freetime. During his freetime, he has the freedom to enjoy things he like. Say, reading, playing tennis/badminton, watching DVD, enjoying computer games, meeting friends ... etc. I do not limit the activity type but do control the time. Say, computer games limits to 20 minutes per day.

Since the beginning of P1, I have been explaining and emphasizing the importance of time management. Let him know his responsibilities and realize the fact that he is capable of achieving many things (including both duties and interests) provided proper planning/scheduling and focus one thing at a time.

Regarding your son's mealtime, may I know if the TV is always on? For my case, we basically only turn on TV for news time. (My son is used to enjoy news time with me and keep asking me questions related to the news. From there, he learns also.)

vincher

回復 samuel89 的帖子

我希望老闆對我……無為而治！
對兒子呢！看其性格……無為而治！我死定！
無為而治 vs 約束式的管治……過猶不及！  還是;;
因材施教 +因地制宜 吧！

Yanamami

回復 huba 的帖子

Since the beginning of P1, I have been explaining and emphasizing the importance of time management. Let him know his responsibilities and realize the fact that he is capable of achieving many things (including both duties and interests) provided proper planning/scheduling and focus one thing at a time.

*****************************************************************************

I think you have been doing an excellent job!

sukihon0

我細細個一路都好自立
因為媽媽係超嚴
成日一食慢少少就藤條到
的確我係好乖
但同媽媽關係就唔係咁好:(

samuel89

vincher 發表於 12-4-4 01:01
我希望老闆對我……無為而治！
對兒子呢！看其性格……無為而治！我死定！
無為而治 vs 約束式的管治……過猶不及！  還是;;
因材施教 +因地制宜 吧！

我對兒子只是儘量無為而治而已.......
老實說,看見阿仔打機開始上癮,要我用施永青先生說的:"放縱佢打到飽, 自然會物極必反自己厭倦"(施生只系講下,最後都放手俾太太有為). 雖然我都信服物極必反呢個定律一定work, 但我一樣會想盡辦法希望阿仔可以及早醒覺, 唔系完全放手無為等阿仔自己厭倦後去到極點才醒覺呵.......

Yanamami

samuel89 發表於 12-4-5 11:59
我對兒子只是儘量無為而治而已.......
老實說,看見阿仔打機開始上癮,要我用施永青先生說的:"放縱佢打到飽,  ...

無為，不是不為，也不是無所為，而是要領導者有所為，有所不為。老子說愛民治國，能無為乎？也就是說一個領導者肩負著人民的重托，要治理一個單位、地方或國家，能什麼都不做嗎？很顯然，他不能，他必須有所作為。老子「為」的最高原則是「為無為」。「為無為」是這樣的一種「為」：在不該為的時候就不為，在該為的時候就要為。這是一種恰到好處的造詣，它體現的是尊重事物自然而然的發展趨勢，也是最智慧、難度最高的、效果最好並且最自然的一種領導方法。因此，老子所講的「無為」不是消極等待，毫無作為，而是以「無為」的態度去「為」，「無為」只是一種現象和手段，最終要達到「無不為」的理想境界。


Copy from:
http://tw.knowledge.yahoo.com/question/question?qid=1306041407671

samuel89

回復 Yanamami 的帖子

老子所講的「無為」不是消極等待，毫無作為，而是以「無為」的態度去「為」，「無為」只是一種現象和手段，最終要達到「無不為」的理想境界。

太高境界......

annie40

回復 samuel89 的帖子

Hi Samuel,

I really agree '無為而治'.  But still highly recommend kids to try other different activies that they may never try and enjoy , such as sports, music, travelling and reading.  To widen their mind and expereience are part of parents mission.     

The addiction always comes from our mind that we thought our favorites and choices are limited.  But in fact it's not true.  Just like if your son likes 婉君表妹,   我必定 提议多j结交几个Barbie dolls or TST Suzie.  One day he finds that 婉君表妹 is extremely boring.   The addiction is strong and becomes a habbit.   At least he knows the exit and   well understand that he has choices , and where and how to make the changes.  It would be huge fun to meet a sunshine and humous girl.  

Perhaps my sharing  is not correct.   但坏习惯是坏习惯, 如果孩子不能自持自省, 而父母等佢有天'叮'一声就明白洒, No guidance and interference.   The chance to make an improvement is slim.   

annie

samuel89

annie40 發表於 12-4-5 14:20
回復 samuel89 的帖子
Perhaps my sharing  is not correct.   但坏习惯是坏习惯, 如果孩子不能自持自省, 而父母等佢有天'叮'一声就明白洒, No guidance and interference.   The chance to make an improvement is slim.   

問題系我相信父母點樣信服 '無為而治'....都一定會guidance and interference的.....只是"年少氣盛"加"忠言逆耳",導致父母講左等於冇講(唉....誰沒年輕過呵)......

ChiChiPaPa

http://zh.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E6%95%99%E8%82%B2%E5%93%B2%E5%AD%A6#_

以上網頁有各類教育理念的簡介,包括“無為”和“自主學習”。

Yanamami

依我愚見, 無為之治只適用於太平盛世.  於兵荒馬亂之時是行不通的.  既然父母早有先機知道打機的坏習慣會形成之前, 何不不讓它有發生的可能?  十歲前當孩子仍會听父母嘮叨之時, 早作調教, 便不至坏習慣已成, 要花十倍氣力去改?
(ChiChiPaPa一定反駁我, 打機並不是甚么坏習慣, 事關囡囡小學也玩慣跑online, 現在一樣名列前茅)

ChiChiPaPa

我對『無為，而無所不為』的解讀是：目光要放遠，要充份考慮每一種做法和可能，不先排除其他人認為不應做的。在眾多選擇中，選最為順其自然的方案。解說無為，多以治水作例子，可築堤，可疏導，當兩個方案都可行時，選疏導的方案。最難不是如何選擇，而是多數情況，人們都會在做研究，找客觀資料前，已把一些認為行不通的選擇先排除了，又或是太遲才去解決問題，以至失去選擇最為自然的方案的時機，又或是以為『無為』就是不聞不問，不去定期檢視，也不作修正。