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Re: HK Preschool - Royal Ascot
[size=large]To all mum and dad
DESCRIPTION OF A JOB VACANCY
FOR A MOTHER'S POST
This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, no one would
have applied for it.
POSITION : Mother, Mum, Mama, Mommy or Ma
JOB DESCRIPTION : Long-term team player needed for
challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidate
must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be
willing to work variable hours which will include evenings and weekends
and frequent
24 hour on-call shifts. Some overnight travel required including trips
to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports
tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses will not be reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.
RESPONSIBILITIES : For the rest of your life. Must be willing to be
hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs a couple of bucks.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the
physical stamina of a packed mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph
in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard
are not from someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face
stimulating technical challenges s uch as small gadget repairs,
mysteriously sluggish or stucked toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen
phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple
homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social
gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be willing to be indispensable one minute and embarrassed the next.
Must handle assembly and product safety testing o f a half million
cheap, plastic toys and battery operated devices. Must always hope for
the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final complete accountability for the quality of the end
product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work
throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :
Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years,
without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so
that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you.
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE : None required, fortunately or unfortunately.
On-the-job training guaranteed for life on a continually exhausting
basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION : Get this right - you pay them, offering
frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18
because of the assumption that college will help them become
financially independent.
When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about
this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you
could only do more.
BENEFITS : While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no
tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are
offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth
and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.
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發表於 07-1-29 19:24
我今朝都俾天文台玩呀......又話暖d, 點知鬼死咁大風, 大家要小心保重.....get well soon
