Can schools influence student characters? 拔尖vs補底：如何選校？

jolalee

Do you think a school with strict discipline can help an active kid stay better focused, and an inquiry-based school help a shy child with better self-initiation? When choosing school, should this be taken into account? Should we look for a school that fits a child's own character, or one that helps 'balance out' the child? Parents with older children please share with us your experiences too. Thank you!

選校時，你會看看學校是否配合你孩子的性情嗎？你覺得不同類型的學校會否影響孩子成長時的性格發展，還是三歲已定八十？你會選擇一間與孩子性情吻合的學校（拔尖）還是一間令孩子在性情 / 學習上要多角度改變 / 適應的學校（補底）？ 孩子較年長的父母歡迎分享你的經驗！

jolalee

My kid is a very active chap who's very inquisitive, talkative and creative. Compared with kids his age he cannot focus well and when faced with a difficult or repetitive task he would shun away from it.

My son is currently in K1. He has a strict teacher who requires strong compliance and order in the classroom. It did him a world of good. He learned to focus better and is able to follow rules in a classroom setting. The system he's currently in trains concentration really well and that's exactly what he needs. However i also noticed he is never really look forward to school, as the teaching style does not encourage creativity or communication as much, of which both he is good in.

For K2 he got into a through-train school which runs IB all the way from kindergarten to high school graduation. I have a feeling he would feel right at home with an inquiry based program, nurturing his strengths such as creativity and communication. However, i'm also worried his weaknesses will not be addressed in such an environment, and would run into trouble lacking good studying habits in the long run. I could still put him back into his existing system, which can go up to Primary 6, or apply for another through-train school which expect kids to be more compliant.

Between a school that fits the child well or one that helps with his weaknesses, how would you choose?


(p.s. I am not stating the school names because i don't want the schools' reputation to cloud judgement, although some friends here know which schools my child is in / is going to. To avoid confusion, yes, these are all International Schools.)

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Go for inquiry based if you value creativity and origination of ideas.  

Outspoken or not (Active or quiet), inquiry based learning train thinking skills.  Communication skills is another issue.


I have seen a happy, talkative, smart, self-assured 3 year old turn into a frightful, quiet, withdrawn 4 year old after one year of K1 in a famous local kindergarten.  She has been completely transformed from a confident little girl into a robot.


Despite I believe discipline is key to success, too much restriction and at too early an age would undermine a child's development.

Ruby1219

i put my son into international schools from pre-school (now he is a secondary school student) although I think he could 'fit' well into local schools (given his personality being introvert, timid and obedient). And, I am glad that I had made a wise choice!
Despite him being rather quiet and introvert (I won't say he's shy, but he is not the out-going and talkative type), he did very well at school in terms of speaking out, doing drama and even presentations! His teachers always comment him as confident and participative, and talk at the appropriate times. And, I don't see that international schools mean lacking of disciplines. It is just very different in teaching and learning approaches.

紅紅

好難講，因為年紀太細，好多嘢是自己平時觀察佢下的結論，但係小朋友可以喺屋企同學校完全兩個樣 。。。

我自己個女，表面性格同你仔差不多，她年紀比較小時（3yrs），我剛回香港，因visa問題不可正式返學，所以只可上playgroup興趣班，諗住佢咁like郁身郁勢，比佢上體操班 。。。點知勁抗拒！（人人以為佢會鍾意）

之後比佢去art class, 親友都話：佢坐唔坐得定架！但又估佢唔到，佢又ok, 仲話好鍾意。

好啦，見佢成日聞歌起舞，我媽話佢跳舞老師有開兒童班（主要跳k-pop），比佢去學，又係唔鍾意。但一年後，佢自己又話想再學跳舞，原因係：因為我e+大個咗！

最近我又諗，都5yrs, 睇吓佢想唔想學楽器，我心目中諗比佢學Ukulele先，諗住好似活潑d啱佢d，點知佢係都要學Piano! 我d親友又係話：好悶架wor, 佢應該唔得架！
但上完幾堂，佢話好鍾意 。。。

所以學校方面，性格因素都有，因為佢性格是越迫越差的人，所以主流學校唔得（已試過）一定要選IS，至於邊間IS, 我比較直接及現實，首先要affordable同accessible，之後就是講求『合眼緣』同『風水』，唔係迷信，冇真係去夾八字，只是有d地方，你去到會感覺到好舒服同自在，有d地方你會覺得好拘束周身唔聚財。我們選了3間學校，帶了女去其中兩間，一間佢冇抗拒，但又不是很雀躍，好indifferent的態度；另一間去完佢問我：聽日係咪可以再嚟？

oooray

jolalee 發表於 14-6-12 01:18
Do you think a school with strict discipline can help an active kid stay better focused, and an inqu ...

A good school itself does not inspire your child. A good teacher does.
Every school has some good teachers and some "fair" teachers.
You can choose your dream school but you cannot choose the teacher, and you never know who is a good teacher beforehand.
Throughout these years I have met quite a number of class teachers for my children and i can tell you that meeting a good teacher is 100% by luck.
The most important point is how do parents communicate with your teachers. Sharing with your teachers about your child goodness and weakness really helps the teachers to help your child.
It is just my personal experiences.

hay.hay.ma.

i put my children in international school because they are active kind of students. they are talkative and playful but the school never labelled them with negative names. on the contrary, they were praised for what they are. my talkative child was commented as reliable for she always spoke the truth or with kind words. the playful one was well liked because he always brought joy to the class. i can't imagine if they spent a great deal of time where they were asked to be someone else.

Radiomama

回覆 oooray 的帖子



That's the point!  

hay.hay.ma.

by the way  i think students of any personality should go to schools that cherish creativity. a student who knows what to ask is more important than knowing the answers.
i strongly believe that schools and parents are partners. if they teach different values or with different disciplinary methods, it will never do the child any good.

poonseelai

原帖由 oooray 於 14-06-12 發表
A good school itself does not inspire your child. A good teacher does.
Every school has some good te ...

同意，好老師可遇不可求，遇到又未必留到，特別是lS的外籍老師，我細女今年7年班，她仍説最懷念3年班老師，他給學生好多鼓勵，可惜教了2年他走去Russia教。老師無得選選，只好選制度。我時常見家長問什麼性格適合國際或lB，是否可坐定定就可讀傳統，我也想不通是雞先定雞蛋先。我只想小朋友他日面對社會，什麼技能、知識可令她們生存容易D

dcnmxw

poonseelai 發表於 14-6-12 11:28
同意，好老師可遇不可求，遇到又未必留到，特別是lS的外籍老師，我細女今年7年班，她仍説最懷念3年班老師， ...

非常同意 poonseelai 講, 呢樣好緊要:
"小朋友他日面對社會，什麼技能、知識可令她們生存容易D"

jolalee

oooray 發表於 14-6-12 11:02
A good school itself does not inspire your child. A good teacher does.
Every school has some good te ...

So true! Thanks for your sharing. Sometimes different teachers like kids of different characters as well. Although most ppl like the well behaved quiet kids, there are those who enjoy chatting and teaching the more active and imaginative kids. I just hope my son will have some teachers through his school life who will appreciate him for who he is.

Ruby1219

jolalee  That's great. Is he is an IB school?

No, he is now in GSIS. used to be in Renaissance College for P1 -3

shadeslayer

原帖由 dcnmxw 於 14-06-12 發表
非常同意 poonseelai 講, 呢樣好緊要:
"小朋友他日面對社會，什麼技能、知識可令她們生存容易D"

但甚麽是將來要的技能是無人知的。只能大路的講語文呀，創造力呀，知識呀，等等。不足以選校。

shadeslayer

原帖由 oooray 於 14-06-12 發表
A good school itself does not inspire your child. A good teacher does.
Every school has some good te ...

but the style of the school definitely affects the kind of teachers they hire, right?

shadeslayer

i tend to think what kind of education i want my child to receive, then observe if she is doing ok.

jolalee

Ruby1219 發表於 14-6-12 17:19
jolalee  That's great. Is he is an IB school?

No, he is now in GSIS. used to be in Renaissance Col ...

How do find the IB curriculum compared with the German Int'l one?

sharons

Ruby1219 發表於 14-6-12 17:19
jolalee  That's great. Is he is an IB school?

No, he is now in GSIS. used to be in Renaissance Col ...

小女性格跟妳兒子差不多, 請問可否分享如何考進 GSIS 及準備時間多久?

jolalee

shadeslayer 發表於 14-6-12 20:05
i tend to think what kind of education i want my child to receive, then observe if she is doing ok...

Yes, that's the thing. I always wanted my child to receive Montessori education. (okay, i broke my own rule, but at least now we know which system i am talking about). He has been in a Montessori school since age 1, and he could continue with Montessori until primary graduation. However, i can tell already that he is doing fine and learning to cope as much as he can, but not yet a fish in his element. Since age 2 I find that he's an auditory learner, and would excel in an inquiry based program with more imaginative play. (Montessori is good for kinesthetic learner, like myself).

I guess my main question is, with a child who may have focus issues, it would be nice to put him in a school that trains a child in self-motivated concentration, but then, he may not do as well and enjoy school as much as he would in another one... So, given i'm moving him to an IB program, would he be missing out on concentration training?

Ruby1219

他考進GSIS 是巧合。我們要從NT 搬到HK side,  所以P.3 時幫他找學校插班。 applied GSIS,  CDNIS, ESF.
ESF 一直waiting list, 等位interview.  CDNIS 因為個scholarship 要考新學年，GSIS 忽然話有位可以interview 先。 得兩日通知。我亦從來不會預備什麼 (尤其是幼稚園和小學),  只跟他說了這學校很好，讓他有心機去interview.  但也有跟他說應該幾難考，有些朋友的小孩考不上，讓他不要太大期望。 最後他幸運地考上了。
我覺得插班可能容易些，GSIS 的turnover rate 很高。 assessment的內容應該不是太難，最重要是英文要native speaking.  能聽、講﹑寫。