Social activity breakthrough

LPYdad1

Happy things to share w/ u parents
(Dont be so sad about autism la)

I have a bit worry about my kid's social ability, close to 5 lor since he prefers playing w/ toys more than kids or people though he is an extremely charming kid.
To solve this problem, I start to bring him to social class at 3.5 upto present every wk. Tutors said he is doing great, technique is similar to his age level, but he is too enjoy playing w/ himself & easily satisfied w/ toys. To him, playing w/ toy is no different to playing w/ a person. His concern is on his intiative, rather than technique.
What should I do? To a certain extent, initiative is even more difficult to conquer than technique. it's about character rather than autism matter to some extent.
Coincidently, I moved to other places with a large garden & playground nearby, a lot alrger than below. I bring him to play in playground every night nearly. For 1st 2 mths, he concentrate on slide, swing, those individual thing. later seesaw, I start to talk to other kids when playing seesaw. He starts to intrude our talking. By then,I  start to encourage him to play slide w/ other kids in some sort of competition of fastness. Later, running w/ other kids in the garden. Even ask me to call other kids to come along to play for running, etc. Starting to miss other kids for his running favourite places.

Wow. I talk to my fd last wk, she also told me that after a wk back from PRC, she found my son changes. I told her mainly social impact seems hiking suddenly perhaps.

Hope my experience give you gals some encouragement.

LPYdad1

原帖由 wah37 於 11-9-7 12:49 發表
Thanks for your sharing.  Yet it seems that your son is just like an ordinary kid, not autistic.
Not comparable?

Dear wah 37,

I always want to tell u gals this point long time ago but there are too many issue you gals want to ask first.
There is very serious misconcept about autism in Hong Kong.
I have attended many seminar , consultant & talks w/ professionals. Particularly, I remember a seminar from a HKU genetic head professor who attend TV shows a few times talking about autism. She believes autism is highly related to genetic factor, similarily meaning there is no cure.
That is so bias.
It is also bias if you receive some ad claiming autism is clueable (like ad from little G)
Pls always remember autism is a development disorder, not a disease. You should never consider a cure, it is already a kind of discrimination I guess. (Actually, US is already considering to change "autism sydrome disorder" to be "persuasive development disorder")
You should think it is a scale. You and me also has development disorder spectrum to a certain extent, but not serious therefore not being classsifed.
Taking a scale from 1 (very serious) to 10 (non-behavioural problem).
Normally, if I assess some of my fd's kid,whether they have development spectrum. Below 3, it is fierce, intensive traing & care is urgent. Below 5 , intensive care is necessary & not late. Below 7, he will need several training to recover his delay probably. 8 probably acting ok, but some area need improvemnt. 9 or above, you already overcome this matter.
I think you know the matters involving the scale, but throw away those specialist list. Pls use your own head and be true to yourself.
Some key items you should take into a/c like:
Speech/listening/Responsiveness
Behavioural matter
Intellectual quotation
Attention/impulsivness/Obedience
Motoring
Social ability (after 4)

Be honest to myself, my kid maybe around 8, I guess.
Of course, the work made before is unbelieviable hard. What treatment/lecture/therapy/training u gals have mentioned, I am quite sure I knew what it is & the reason behind, & most I have tried before probably. Even like lime treatment or brain cell implantation I knew that but not tried.

Remember your kid relies on you. First is your love, and then your intelligence. Involving in tons of reading & thinking. By then, time & money. Use them wisely.

I have said there has to be a sequence & contradiction of training & treatment. That is also crucial for overcome this disorder. However, each person is different. The step you need to take is therefore different to each person. If you want some suggested schedule, dont hesitiate to contact me. But I need to know in very details & time of course.

God bless you all.

LPYdad1

Sorry
One key factor not mentioned
Emotion/feelings

angels'mom

My son has problem with his social skills, i.e., if he has any.  Do you mind sharing what social class you have brought your son to, and how the social class has helped your son.

LPYdad1

Dear angel's mom,
My son attend one in wanchai. The tutor is gd coz she is quite honest. When my son attend the class, she mentioned one first thing I particularly feel comfortable is that social class will help u with social skills, sometimes attention & behavioural problem. However, pls remember yr kid whether enjoy playing w/ others has not remedy from social class since everyone's character is different. It's his own interest.
That's going back why I encourage u parents to bring yr kid to go playground/countryside to play. The benefits are unbelievable. It involves attention, sensory, emotion & feeling, motoring, social, health, even speech, etc. ANd this part I am very confident about the result. But of course, u might need to avoid the eyes from other parents if your kid's development disorder is significant. My school principal & teachers just ask me on last friday about the night playground playing thing w/ my son, perhaps, they have sensed my son's social interaction improves. Hahaha...
Name of social class will pm u later.

KELSEYLI

hi, LPYdad1, may i know is your social skill class in wanchai conduct in english? My son currently attends a social skill class in wan chai now. He is dignosed with asperger, he has some social problem and sensory intergration disorder.He speaks fluent of english and cantonese.But he refused to talk in front of the class and sometimes he will not answer even his best friend talk to him.I tried many ways to help him. I have been consulted with many different doctors  and therapist. I am so worry. I will try to bring him to the playground to play. hopefully, he is willing to play with others. ( rather than play with his elder brother)

LPYdad1

Dear Kelseyli,

A few things need to know, like what social problem - violence, perception, prejudice, anti-social activity or what? Each has some different fundamental reason from the brain.
Sensory deficiency I will try to write something but time is needed, since the story is long & I need to find back some material I read.
Social gp my son attend is Cantonese, pm u if you want to know.

Twins_Mom

Would you mind PM me the details of training centre?  Tks

angels'mom

原帖由 LPYdad1 於 11-9-14 19:56 發表
Dear angel's mom,
My son attend one in wanchai. The tutor is gd coz she is quite honest. When my son attend the class, she mentioned one first thing I particularly feel comfortable is that social clas ...

Dear LYPdad1,

Thanks for the reply and suggestion.  I trust that bringing children to the playground will benefit them.  It's just that it's either too hot, rainy or too many mosquitoes.  My husband and I have brought our son to an indoor facility in summer.  Even though it hasn't helped him socially, he has improved a great deal physically.

My son looks perfectly normal, except that he lacks social skills.  He doesn't play with other children, and doesn't know how.  For example, he always goes back to the end of the line when there are other children playing with the slide.  He slides down only when no one's waiting.  But, he is improving.

Please pm me the social class when you have time.  I hope it can help him.

[ 本帖最後由 angels'mom 於 11-9-15 17:54 編輯 ]

LPYdad1

Dear Angel's mom,

Outdooe playground is definitely a lot better than indoor coz there are a lot more facility including slide, swing, seesaw, spiderpweb, latters for kid to play. Each helps kids' development in certain way. For instance, swing improves expression, spiderweb - correlation of body, latters - correlationof body & speech. I suggest to try not to miss this. I brought my son to playground at night time to avoid the heat & sunburn, but may not be necessary in autumn & winter. Mosquitos thing just use spray or sticker or even chinese perfume should not be a big problem. One tip I tell u is that I found the best playground I ever went to is the one in Mody Road TST ( though far from where I live) coz there are a lot of ladders which seldom found in other govt playground.

Get u another suggestion, I seldom intrude my son's play in playground now. But beforehand, I did help him to choose what to play with. Firstly, his decision ALWAYS comes first. Say like he likes playing slide, no matter how strange he play with it, I will alow himm to play at least for 10 mins. By then, I will grab him and ask him to play with another instrument like swing. If he is ok, I will let him play up to an end. If he refuse after try or not, I will grab him for another instrument. If still refuse, I will grab him for another one. After the 3rd try if he still refuse, I will let him play with the only one the slide for another ten mins. After that, we shall leave the place. I dont have much troube since my kid enjoy playing with a lot of things with me. And plz remember u shll not change yr option too many times, I suggest not more than 5 times within an hr. Another skill is that after he tried a new instrument such as a spider web, I will grab him and hold him high as a kind of compliement to try new things and greet him for success. My kid always laugh at such excitment.
My son plays another unknown boy about half a yr younger for about 20-30 mins about running and slide tonight. Another 30 mins playing swing with me alone. It's so great.
Playing with other should ALWAYS start with fun first. You should make him having great fun to play no matter alone or with other kids together. After u think he is fun enought alone, you should encourage him to compete with u or yr hus in slide or swing or running, by then encourage him to run with other kids, then play insturments w/ other kids. Be step by step. Talk about the step & skills in playing more next time.
Try to pm u gals the social class & kindergarten asap, since I am so poor in chinese wordprocessing.

LPYdad1

One more thing

Not know how is a bit excuse.
Primarily is the initiative,
2nd is skills.
From yr writing, it seems he lacks the initiative rather than skills.
Initiative is a difficult task since it imvolves lots of non development disorder thing like anxiety, interest, past experience, etc and development disorder thing like attention problem, sensory problem, impulsiveness, etc
One idea you may try is to u and yr hus play with him first at home or in public, getting him play with unknown kids are too advanced, u may choose play with him, then other adults by then, and then other elderly known kids who like to play him, and so on. Play ground and home is easier place u could handle.
Skills I think it is a bit easier to hande if yr kid has not intellectual and major speech & hearing problem.

Capricorn2521

好同意你的說法，也是大約我一貫的手法。多謝作出如此詳盡的解釋‧

原帖由 LPYdad1 於 11-9-16 23:22 發表
Dear Angel's mom,

Outdooe playground is definitely a lot better than indoor coz there are a lot more facility including slide, swing, seesaw, spiderpweb, latters for kid to play. Each helps kids' dev ...

angels'mom

Thanks LPYdad1 for your thorough explanation and tips.  It is true that he lacks the initiative to socialize.  The Mody Road playground - is that the one one next to the Middle Road carpark?  If it is, I have brought him there.  It's a really good playground.  My mom used to bring me there when I was a kid.

We've been trying to get my daughter to play with my son.  I guess it has something to do with my son's development as well.  He hasn't been too eager to play with his sister before, but now he's much more involved and really enjoys playing with her.

LPYdad1

Dear all and angel's mom,

Inof about social class already pm u gals. Let me know if I miss anyone.
(Actually, I have tried to type those chinese word for nearly an hr since my chinese wordprocessing is so poor)
For angel'smom,
I have tried to pm u the social class info about social class but in vain.
Let me know if u have any problem from yr ac or u need me to send u through yr own email ac

LPYdad1

Dear gals,

My son plays scooter racing with two brothers one about 9 using a more advanced scooter (2 wheels) and the other about 3 tonight. Each have a scooter and riding around in govt playground & garden.
Actually I myself can't monitor a scooter, I dont know how comes they kids could play such thing that fast.
But anyway, such social bonding is memoriable and amazing.

angels'mom

原帖由 LPYdad1 於 11-9-24 02:21 發表
Dear gals,

My son plays scooter racing with two brothers one about 9 using a more advanced scooter (2 wheels) and the other about 3 tonight. Each have a scooter and riding around in govt playground & ...

LIKE

angels'mom

原帖由 LPYdad1 於 11-9-22 00:03 發表
Dear all and angel's mom,

Inof about social class already pm u gals. Let me know if I miss anyone.
(Actually, I have tried to type those chinese word for nearly an hr since my chinese wordprocessing  ...

It looks like I haven't been able to receive your pm.  Please check to see whether you got mine.

LPYdad1

Pls check if u received the info