小學生的家長請留意

Eva

最近在亞女學校的座談會上,講者有一個像是離題但又很有啟示似的提點. 我自己像被當頭棒喝! 想同大家分享一下,唔知你地有無我的感覺呢? 如果有的話, 要多多留意LAR!

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她說她有很多夫妻關係出現問題的CASES. 原因竟多是因為小朋友. 他們的夫妻關係多是從小孩子誕生之後開始起變化. 也多是因為妻子方面太投入小朋友的世界, 缺小了, 甚至是完全忽略了對方的存在, 不但沒有了昔日的親密和關懷,甚至會因為子女的問題而遷惱於對方. 關係也因此日漸疏離,尤其是小朋友上了小學之後, 情況更加惡劣. 而事實上外面的引誘很大, 很多時大家因為沒有了良好的溝通, 一時的失落和不滿, 就此行差踏錯….

雖然聽起來覺得對D盡心盡力的媽咪好似唔係咁公平, 但為免悲劇發生, 我現在多了”應酬”老公. 又見佢好似真係開心左好多WOR  希望各位姊妹沒有以上的問題, 大家生活愉快

Eva

wunma

How many kids do you have?  I think even not because of kids, too busy in working is also harmful to our relationship... try to talk more to each other lar!!

I think one kid is better.  Since I have 2 kids, I also busy to treat them.  My husband wants to help but he seems not funny enough to treat them.  Both of them like to stick on me, that makes me no time to talk to him even when he wants to tell me something happended in his office.  At night time, always after 11:00pm, it is my happy hours.  I enjoy to read my news paper or facing to my computer.  I will show no interests to his talk.... therefore, at night time, a standard picture always appears like that: I am sitting in front of my computer and my hubby is sitting in front of his TV..... and then, always my hubby goes to sleep first.... say goodnight.... I will go to sleep later, but normally, he has slept at that time.....

After attending the speach, I will try to improve myself and pay more attention to his wordings now.  I wish all of us can afford to do very best in the future.

Teresa

Teresa

Eva,

謝謝你的分享！

我都知道很容易出現這些問題，在仔仔小時候，我真的“要仔不要公”！！！後來想想這樣不是辦法，看見老公被仔仔“橫刀奪愛”，又真的很可憐！所以我們現在有了共識：每星期六是我們的拍拖日，仔仔就由工人帶他上興趣班。星期日纔是我們的家庭日！

Eva

wunma
You are really lucky to have your husband who can share your child-minding work.  My husband is a good daddy too but he is capable to take care of our kids physically only.  I always ask him to read some books or to attend some classes about how to be friend of our kids, but he seems no interests on it!!  You know, after having our first baby about 7 years ago, same as you and Teresa, I was always baby first and expected him to be the same as me.  After my daughter promoted to P1 last year, I spend more time to accompany her and I also need to  care of my 3 years old son who is more demanding day by day.  I feel no time to entertain my husband.  The worst case is that I feel he is troublesome day by day.  After attending the talk, I realised that I should not concern my feeling only and expect him to have the same thinking as mine.  I must be more considerate/respect him....

Teresa
One of my friends also acts like you, to have a 2-persons day once a week.  I found it is really a very good idea and I tried.  Unfortunately, both of us felt uncomfortable to go outside without bringing our two kids together.  Maybe, our sweetest day passed and our two kids do replace each of our positions in our life!

gigi2

Yes, I also feel guilty of leaving them alone but go outside for entertainment with my husband only.  It's much worse because we have 2 children and the time is not enough for doing so.

But fortunately my husband is considerate to have time sharing with his children.  A good quality of conversation for only 30 minutes each day after our children gone to sleep which is the precious moment to us for effective communication and show the understandings to each other.